As I think back to our betrothal, I remember our church was in the middle of one of those prophetic declarations of "debt free for you and me." You know the type we speak of...right? As a part of this, we wrote down all our debt and brought it to church and showed each other how much debt we had. We looked at each other with our miniscule combined debt and hefty 401k savings, and exclaimed, "this is great we can aggressively tackle this little bit of debt and still have a truck load to invest in the vision God has given us."

Then KABOOM, I got laid off, got a job, and then was laid off again. Stanley was laid off too. It became a joke that he was semi-retired! We had to use all of our savings to live. In less than 2-3 years, we spent thousands of dollars and had paid off none of our debt. The transition to financial freedom was nowhere in sight.

At times, we thought what happened to God's promise of opening up the windows of heavens and pouring out the blessings we have no room to receive?

What about you...have you had this or similar thoughts?

Here are 8 Pina Principles to sidestep obstacles, crossover financially, and win:

1 - Use Your Strengths
Typically every marriage has a spender and a saver. Generally one person is better at saving. The saver can view the spender as immature and irresponsible. On the other hand, the spender sees the saver as too frugal and a dream killer. Instead of letting it divide you, use the strength of the saver to stick to your financial savings plan and build financial security for the family.

2 - Trim the Excess Fat
The average household carries about $10k in credit card debt. To begin to eliminate excessive debts you need more money to conquer the habits that enslaved you. You can gain more money by reducing the "extras" and your living expenses. Cut out the monthly shopping sprees, eating out at extravagant restaurants, stop loaning family and friends money, and increase your insurance deductibles. We had to give up going to Starbucks and Stop & Shop everyday and purchase a home warranty to alleviate unexpected home repair costs. Where can you slash costs? Every little bit adds up and can go towards paying extra to eliminate your debt.

3 - Be a Team
According to a Harris Interactive survey, only 50% of couples maintain combined accounts while 18% keep separate bank accounts. Wow! Only half were team players with their spouse. To win financially utilize a team approach. One thing that has always been true for Stanley and I is that what I have is his and whatever he has is mine. So when I wasn't working, he dipped into his 401k savings repeatedly for our expenses and when he wasn't working, I did the same and carried the load financially. If I ate, he ate. When I paid "my bills," "his bills" were paid in tandem. If I treated myself to something special, I treated him as well. This set the tone for us, in the sense we never fought about this is "my money" or that is your bill. After all, arguing is not going to reduce your monthly debt!

4 - What's the Grand Total?
As Stanley and I began to take steps to become financially free, we identified our total debt amount. I'll never forget that day. I called Stanley on the cell phone and said, "What do you think our total debt is?" He guessed a couple of numbers and neither of them were accurate. I couldn't believe the number either. Why? Because we constantly guesstimated our debt by saying it's about $20k or we don't have a lot of debt only $25k. It was neither. The truth about your total debt will set you free. Find out your grand total and use it to mobilize your debt free campaign. We can help by providing you with a complimentary Financial Needs Analysis. Read the closing paragraph for more details.

5 - Get a Grip
Get a grip and keep track of your money and budget. It can be as simple as an Excel spreadsheet to track income and expenses or a software package such as Microsoft Money or Intuit's Quicken.

6 - Talk, Talk, Talk
Find a way to communicate in a healthy manner about your family's financial plan and goals. As we know, money can be the number one stressor in marriage. It is what some couples fight about the most. Many of these fights are the result of unclear or unspoken expectations. We strongly urge you to block off time for financial planning and discussions to track progress or lack thereof.

7 - Move Forward Now
I shoulda did "x" or I woulda did "y" isn't gonna get you free in your finances. It's done now. Don't pout about it, blame your partner, or let it paralyze you into inactivity. Think of it like this, the longer you do nothing, the longer you stay in bondage. Commit to moving forward now.

8 - Fess Up
You need help with your finances. Admit it...things have snowballed into some serious debt and you are in the red. If so, get some help. It could be a combination of a financial planner, securing additional income, or a coach to identify the things you believe about money that are keeping you in debt. In either case talking to an objective professional partner can ease some of the tension.

We pray these principles bring value and shed light upon your marriage.

Closing Words for Leaders

Being in a financially out of control relationship is no fun and certainly brings God (0) zero glory. If you need the professional help we referenced in this issue, get it and get financially fre.e. We can help by providing a complimentary financial needs analysis. Just pick up the phone and call...we will come to you. So what's your excuse now?

Couples Workshop
This half-day workshop is for married couples who desire to gain tools to relate to one another in a healthier, balanced manner. See the workshop details and sign up your group right here.

Explode Your Marriage...With Vision
A package for couples who desire to create a vision for how they want to live and finish life together. Couples with a common mission, vision, and purpose have passion for living, remaining close, and finishing well. So team up with Stanley and Karen to create your couples commune-vision.

We would love to hear how Gem News is challenging and refreshing you, sparking new ideas, and making a difference in your life.

"If your spouse is evolving financially, you should be changing too!"
-Stanley Pina